The Wounded
by Kelik
Summary: There is a darkness inside of us all; a sinister darkness that threatens to consume. When one undergoes such a tragedy, that darkness spreads and seeps into our very souls, into our skin and bones. The darkness never goes away, it only grows. But sometimes - sometimes there are people who are there to guide us through, for even in the darkest of places - light can always be found.
1. Fear

_**Fear**_

_"Being brave isn't about being unafraid. It's about functioning through the fear."_

_-Jessica Anderson_

* * *

They came like a tornado, bursting through the door guns blazing. It wasn't much of a surprise, he'd later come to recall. It was bound to happen, what with that last case blowing his cover of death. It had been revealed by the one person he thought would never be a problem. The one person who despised him more than anything. The person who had been more than content to take all the credit - but that was just it. This time, it wasn't credit - it was blame. Blame for messing it up - for grabbing the wrong guy and letting the murder get away. Blame for missing something so simple - so incredibly small that it wasn't a surprise the great Kogoro Mouri missed it. But Shinichi Kudo, the High School detective of the East, should have seen it. He should have known something was missing, but he let his guard down. Let himself relax. That was his first mistake. Haibara had been so close to figuring out the cure for the Apoptoxin, he was going to soon be returned to his body. But then another murder. All eyes had fallen to Kogoro Mouri, who under the scrutiny of the entire nation, had cracked. He said it was Shinichi Kudo who'd given them to information.

So that's how, only a little over a week later, Conan Edogawa found himself staring down the barrel of Gin's .50 Pistol. The blonde assassin's eyes skimmed over his shrunken form, confusion clear on his face. Vodka stood behind them, equally as confused. "Shinichi Kudo," Gin sneered. The detective merely stared back. "So the poison didn't kill you." No, it had done exactly the opposite, but the detective remained silent. The hit came suddenly, unexpect, from behind him and darkness swallowed him whole.

Everything led to that moment. The moment the door flew open and all eyes fell on him, he knew there was no use fighting. He knew what he looked like. What Haibara looked like. He knew no one would understand. Hell, not even he truly understood. He stared down at the clothes in his hands, his old clothes. Conan's clothes. "Co..Conan…" he knew that voice, he'd know it anywhere, but he couldn't bring himself to lift his head. The strangled sob that followed just made him shrink into himself. Conan Edogawa was no more. Ran's screams bounced from stone wall to stone wall. It was then the clothes were taken from him and an arm circled around his shoulders, helping him stand on familiar legs that strangely no longer felt like his own.

"It's a'right, Kudo," a voice whispered in his ear. "Yer safe now." He was safe. He was himself - but he didn't feel like himself. He was too tall. His legs too long. Every step he took was heavy and unstable, his balance off centered. The tan arm around his shoulder gradually moved to his waist to help steady him. The Osakan lead him out of the gothic building, pausing only for a moment when Shinichi himself froze in shock. Gin. Vodka. Chianti. Korn. Bourbon. Each and everyone were being loaded away, stuffed carelessly into the backs of different Squad cars. A sense of calm settled over his tired limbs as Shinichi was once again lead away. "What 'appened? Yer… You." Heiji Hattori spoke softly, voice barely above a whisper when the pair of Detectives made it to an empty squad car. The Detective of the West arranged his companion to sit comfortably in the back before climbing in after him. Shinichi said nothing and just leaned back into his friend, eyes falling shut. Heiji's sigh barely registered before those tanned arms were back, holding the pale teen closer. When the officer who would be taking them to the hospital arrived, neither moved and the officer was wise enough to not say anything.

Hours later, when the doctor finally allowed visitors, only the Osakan was allowed in. At night, when visiting hours had ended, the Osakan remained at the weakened detective's request. When the nightmares began, the Osakan as there to chase them away. Things were never going to be the same, the Osakan knew. Shinichi Kudo had returned - but at what cost.

* * *

_**Hey guys, Kaelrah here. So, I'd like to take this moment to thank those of you who decided to read this, and I hope you liked it! This will be continued (i.e it's not a one shot) and I would love some feedback. This is my first fic here, and my first Case Closed/Detective Conan Fic. I've recently begun watching this anime again, and this idea showed up in a dream I had last night. This won't be ShinRan. I'm not sure if it'll be Slash though either. As of right now, it's mostly just Heijichi friendcentric. In chapters soon to come, Kaito will also make his appearance. Also, if this is hard to understand I am dearly sorry! It will all be explained in the following chapter!**_


	2. Deceit

_**Deceit**_

_"There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way, and not starting."_

_- Buddah_

* * *

The nightmares came suddenly, crashing into him like a freight train. It was to be expected, the doctors said. When one undergoes a tragedy, nightmares are often a way to help cope. They just frightened him. Each Nightmare brought back memories of them and he didn't want to remember that. He didn't want to remember his many nights, chained and gagged against the course walls made of poorly cut stone, stained with blood from the many victims of them. He didn't want to remember Haibara's screams, nor his own. He didn't want to remember anything - but his statement was needed. Heiji had been holding them off, though it helped that every time a question was asked, he just shut down.

"Where is he," it was Ran's voice that broke him out of his thoughts. The thoughts that had consumed him for the past week. The plush hospital bed beneath him had been a constant presence, the doctors forbidding him from leaving the bed until their assessments were completed. "Where is he," she repeated, her voice hoarse and barely above a whisper, Conan's clothes clasped firmly in her hands. "Where is he." She repeated, louder, blood-shot orbs raising to the battered and broken form of her childhood friend. "Where is he," she shrilled once again, storming into the room, standing so she was towering over the detective. "Why didn't you protect him!" She hissed, throat tightening with another bout of sobs. "He looked up to you! He trusted you!" If only she knew. If only he could tell her the truth behind Shinichi Kudo and Conan Edogawa. But the truth was now best left in the darkness of his mind - left to brew and stir and attack his very being, but never would it see the light of day. Not by Ran. Never by her.

"Enough, Ran!" Heiji snapped, stepping in front of the raging Karate champion to stand between her and the bed-ridden detective. "This isn't Kudo's fault!" Oh how he knew Heiji wanted to tell everything. To explain that Conan wasn't gone - to explain that Conan had never truly existed. But they couldn't. It was best to let them grieve for his loss and move on. Ran said nothing to the Osakan, her gaze firmly set on the young man behind him. "Get her out of he-"

"No," Shinichi's voice, soft and rough, sounded. Pale blue orbs gazed daringly back at the young woman. "Get Megure. They need my statement…" Heiji's shoulders squared as he turned his head to stare at the detective. At Shinichi's nod, the Osakan huffed out a heavy sigh and went in search of the inspector.

It took less than ten minutes for the Inspector to arrive, his face flushed and eyes curious. "Kudo?" Shinichi forced himself up, Heiji moving to his side the moment he made to move. With the other's help, Shinichi settled up against the headboard, pillows cushioning his back.

"He's dead," Shinichi began, head bowed and hands folded on the ivory sheets clustered on his lap. "Gin. Vodka." His voice wavered as the names fell heavily onto his tongue. "They gave him… they gave him some sort of poison. I couldn't stop them… I tried. Haibara… Conan… They gave it to them both…" Ran's strangled, furious sob broke through the silence that had fallen across the room. The girl threw herself at the bed, only to be restrained by Heiji. She struggled and fought against the detective, trying with all her might to reach Shinichi in her rage.

"But, we didn't find their bodies," the Inspector frowned.

"Blow torch," Shinichi whispered, hands curling into fists and his heart leapt into his throat, strangling the sob that threatened to break free. Heiji's eyes widened as he looked to his companion. The burns. The Osakan's eyes drifted towards the injured man's stomach, then back up to his chest.

"The burns," Heiji whispered. Megure's eyes flicked from one detective to the other. "They used it on you…" Shinichi merely nodded.

"You'll have found the blow torch by now." Pale blue orbs clenched shut as the memories took hold and he slumped back down onto the bed. "You'll find the ashes in the corner," he whispered before rolling to his side, facing the wall. No one spoke for a long moment, too shocked by the news. When Ran's mouth opened, ready to spew out more questions, Heiji rushed to shoo everyone out of the room before retaking his seat by Shinichi's bed.

"You tried your best, Kudo. You nearly died too." Heiji whispered to his friend. No reply came.

* * *

**Hey guys, Kelik here again. So, I'd like to again, thank you all for reading. Also again, I would love some feedback. I know things might still be a bit confusing, but please stick with it - all will be explained very very soon! Next Chapter will introduce Kaito! And the chapter after, the awaited Flash-Back! So again, please just stick with it! Thanks again! R&R!**


	3. Darkness

**_Darkness_**

_"No matter how dark the moment, love and hope are always possible."_

_- George Chakiris_

* * *

Heiji said it wasn't his fault daily. Each time Shinichi jerked awake with a strangled sob, sweat glistening across his skin, dark hair clinging to his forehead, Heiji was there with a tender word or two. The Osakan would rock him back to sleep, cradling the broken man he'd grown so close to during his time as a shrunken child. Since giving his statement, no one but Heiji was allowed into his room. Seeing them, all of them, it was just too hard. And then the note came. Heiji had been adamant in Shinichi not reading whatever had been written, but he knew the handwriting. He knew the note and from whom it was sent.

_When the moon comes out to play, glistening in full, the Stars of Africa will show their ugly sheen. I will steal that which has never been stolen before, catch me if you can._

**_- The Phantom Thief KID_**

The note brought a bitter smile to the young detective's lips, hands trembling as the note curled under his clenching fists. Heiji was ranting about insufferable bastards, demanding to know why the thief would send him a note while he lay broken in a hospital bed. In the evening, an hour past sunset, Shinichi bid Heiji goodnight, ordering the Osakan home for a night of full rest. At first the other argued, claiming he should stay just in case something happened. But Shinichi merely shook his head with a promise to call if he needed the other's presence. When the moon rose above the clouds, just a minute after midnight, there came a light 'tap, tap' tapping at the window. The small figure cast a large shadow in the room as the dove continued it's pecking. Shinichi pushed the heavy blankets aside and stood on shaky legs, making his way silently to the window. With the latch unlatched and trembling hands pushing the glass aside, he watched the Dove until it flapped its beautiful wings and took flight, swirling around the room carefully. Shinichi was not to be distracted.

"You caught me, Tanteikun," a voice so soft it was merely a whisper in the breeze engulfed him, easing the remaining tension from his limbs. A figure clad in weight dropped to the window sill, violet orbs boring down into Shinichi's blues. Neither made any further movement, merely watching the other until Shinichi found himself in the firm hold of the thief, face buried into the ivory fabric stretched across his chest. "What did they do to you, Meitantei," the thief whispered, holding onto the detective as if to protect him from the other world. Shinichi was tense for a long moment before he returned the embrace, refusing to relinquish his hold quite yet. They stood that way for a long moment, as if to reassure themselves that yes - the detective was alive, broken yes, but alive. Silently, the thief lifted Shinichi into his arms and carried him back to the bed, settling them both down. Never once did his hold ever loosen.

Stroking the detective's hair, Kaitou let himself breath easier. It had been much too long since he'd seen the other male, and when he'd learned of the abduction, he'd done everything in his power to find the young detective. "It was you, wasn't it," Shinichi finally whisper, voice muffled by the chest that had caught the few tears trickling down his rosy cheeks. Kaitou needed no explanation as to what the detective was talking about, but he stayed silent never the less. Shinichi had already figured the answer out, it was no use saying anything about it. "Your note made no sense," he whispered again, twisting his face so only his cheek was against the thief's chest, blue orbs blinking away another set of tears as he stared up at the other's face. Kaitou just chuckled and bopped the teen on the nose with a wiggling finger.

"Uh-uh-uh, Meitantei," he chirped far too happily, given the situation. "The stars have not yet shown their ugly sheen." The words merely brought a frown of confusion to detectives face. There were no jewels to be found within the hospital room, so what could he possibly be talking about. Knowing he'd not receive an answer, however, he remained silent and allowed himself to relax in the other's arms. "I'm thinking of giving up the name Phantom Thief KID," the thief confessed after another few minutes of silence, hands gliding through the chocolate locks of the teen clinging to him. Shinichi blinking owlishly, a soft 'hmm' of curiosity escaping his lips. "The Organization has been taken down. I don't think I have to keep searching for Pandora anymore." It was explanation enough, though it still confused Shinichi to no end. But then again, everything the thief had ever done confused him.

"What will you do if you give up being a thief," he inquired softly. He'd miss their blatant games of Cat and Mouse, their companionable debates and sly tricks. He'd miss the thrill of chasing the thief all over. Losing the thief would be like losing Conan completely. The thief remained silent, fingers still carding through the thick locks upon the teen's head.

"I think I might take up being a full-time Magician. That's what I love doing, anyways. It made me the perfect Kaitou KID." And so it had. The thought of no longer going on his escapades was very different, and not entirely a pleasant feeling. "It'll give you a chance to get to know the real me, ne Tantei-kun?" He'd hoped it would anyways. He very much enjoyed their battles of superiority. The cat chasing the mouse up to the roof, only to lose him in the very end. Sometimes, Kaitou would catch that tiny smirk as he'd leap off of the building, a smirk letting him know that he'd been allowed to win. Kaitou always would pretend that the smirk meant 'until next time,' but that was merely to save his wounded pride. He knew there had been many-a-time when the young detective could have caught him. But they had bought enjoyed the game far too much to let it end.

Shinichi said nothing and the two fell back into a comfortable silence. Five. Ten. Fifteen minutes ticked past before Shinichi spoke. His words soft as he regarded their… 'unique' situation. "How would I know it was you, if I were to ever meet you." The question had been plaguing his mind since the thief announced his likely retirement from thievery. Kaitou merely laughed and whispered a soft 'oh, tantei-kun, you'll know.'

As the sun fought it's way back to the sky, neither made any move to disentangle their limbs. When the clock chimed six, however, the thief extracted himself from the detective and gave the broken man a tender smile. Shinichi watched, only noticing the tears that escaped the corners of his eyes when the thief's eyes became overjoyed, a gloved hand reaching forward to swipe them away. "There they are. The Stars of Africa have shown their ugly sheen at last," he whispered before leaning in, pressing their foreheads together. "I will steal that which has never been stolen before, Tantei-kun," the thief warned before warm lips were pressed against Shinichi's. Lips locked, and body stiff in surprise, Shinichi could do nothing but accept the thief's theft. A kiss, but surely the thief knew he'd been kissed before. The detective got his answer as the thief withdrew, leaving the detective with another peck to the forehead. "I will steal your heart," Kaitou whispered before withdrawing the the window, falling out and rising on his glider, twisting and weaving his way back to his home, wherever that might be.

Shinichi watched the thief until he was merely a dot on the horizon, trembling fingers tracing his lips. he collapsed back onto the bed, drawing the blankets up around him as he curled in on himself, lost in his thoughts. The thief never ceased in surprising him. When the Osakan came at nine, Shinichi was still curled up in his little ball of blankets, though he was sleeping soundly. His night with the thief had left him calmer than any night he'd spent with the Osakan, and he highly doubted it would be their last night together. Though there was still a long way to go on his shabby path of recovery, the aid of the Osakan and the mind-boggling Thief would surely get him where he was going.

* * *

**Hey guys, Kelik again. So sorry this chapter took longer to get up. I hope you enjoy it though! So a question of Why Ran acted the way she did came up - hopefully I'll have answered this in the next chapter. Also, more about The Phantom Thief and why Shinichi was so relaxed around him will be explained as well. So please stay tuned, and hopefully I'll be able to get the next chapter out sooner! As always, please R&R!**


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